In my childhood I was a very shy person not opening up quickly, no friends and no conversations. All I needed was my mother. But at that time my mother used to travel a lot leading to me crying in a corner for hours with her passport size picture in my hands, holding tight to it. Whenever she went out obviously she was busy no time to call again and again so talking to, listening to her voice was only possible when she came back.
Then again she had to go, this time for 6 months. She didn't tell me that it was this long as I was just five. I would start crying and ask her to stay and all the drama that I would do, which she didn't wanted. I was in hope to see her the next day when I wake up but every morning till six months was a disappointment. Then I was taken to her in our native place. It was just for a few days, say two or three days as we had our schools going on and missing school meant missing notes of eight subejects which would be very difficult to complete if long holidays are taken. Though I could live just this much with her I was happy, I also had to worry about my exams as no one else was going to do that for me. So when I was told that it's time to go I packed my bag and headed ahead.
She came back after few weeks and I felt as if I was on the ninth cloud. But there was this fear that had caught me. Whenever she went out just in the town itself I started crying and asked her to take me along but she won't , how could she she had to carry the bags of things she would buy from the market. This happened again and again , her leaving me, her coming back and yet packing to leave again, leaving me devastated.
I have no idea when I started becoming rude to her , getting angry all the time, I talked very less to her, and would always deny for everything she asked me to do. But even then at that time also if she went out I would cry yet again. My love for her never left may be it is in every heart the love for your mother never leaves you, you just start covering it with various things like anger or ignorance. This continued for almost four to five years.
Then came the angel of my life, my big brother. He had been studying in a different city and now was back home to join business. In the start I was very afraid of him, he seemed to be so strict about everything. He saw my everyday behaviour and started trying to change me. Earlier I was very stubborn and would nod to whatever he said as I was afraid of him but still not Di anything about it. We then had lots of discussions where in I would cry and cry and he would try to explain me things like this behaviour will not help you in the future, people won't ever become your friends if you remain like this etc. After almost one year of struggle, there was seen some change. This continued to happen the topics of discussions shifted. He was now married and my sister in law also got into the process. They helped me become a better person to live with. I can never thank them enough for this.
He also changed my attitude towards mom. He has not just been my brother but also my friend, my father, my life.
Whatever I am today is because of my family. Especially my mom, dad , brother and sister in law.
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